benzrad, 华中朱子卓
朱本主子卓日美。

By: benzrad | December 22, 2017

Dec 19, 2017

dreamt being friend of an English noble family, or Japanese host, ie their 2 boys and only daughter. first the boys showed me their real estate, and traditional kid practices around & in trench of their castle, which so beautiful, with yard and fence, and harvesting field with peasants nearby. I commented British buildings usually round shape while Chinese commodity residential block usually in slice alike. they also showed me their parties. then their only sister returned. the girl likely an artist, she put on me new shirt & introduced me to her party. when I prepared to performance and jumping from 2nd floor balcony to hall ground over awaiting crowd, my alarm woke me up. it's a warm dream, without pressure, esp the da...

By: benzrad | November 09, 2017

Nov 9, 2017

dreamt of a podcasting event. the host likely recent hot leaker, Guo wengui (@KwokMiles), who revealed lots of dark scandals of CCP high ranks. the first version was cancelled and the Guo decided to remake. a new van pulled in, likely as an award for the publish, but its tire is half empty. I among other volunteers push the van to podcasting stage. I also handle the microphone, wire connection, recording etc. yesterday really overwhelmingly elated. a planned event aid by my elder brother realized: renew woz's dearest domain, woz.fm for 2 more years now that migration to new registrar who support 4 years ahead to subscribe. our first registrar, godaddy forbidden more than a year to renew the domain, so every year I was anxious about it, and last year I actually paid more for the domain after it entered recovery mode strangely before expire date. also, the domain under icann's administrative increases price $25 since next month. so I badly want to save the ¥500 before new renewal charge complies. I never thought I would raise money from my hometown relatives who mostly live average lives. but God know its OK. my kid brother who has a small mill & bought 2 large houses, dishonored me bitchily each time I ask for loan, did same lest my another aid request. but my 2nd elder brother, my childhood main adversity and in recent years whose contribution to our old family, esp his favorite fishing skill brought more colorful meals in our old family times, warmed my heart and turned me into gratitude, and started to appreciate his loneliness & self-efficacy. this time he touched by my cause & urged my kid brother leased the loan from his own proxy, even his family was not so wealthy to loan me. God dad, now I gained loans from both my sisters and brothers, each ¥1200. 2017 designated to be blessing, like yesterday's shallow snow here. God dad, grant me growing our fortitude against harsher siege PRC surveillance setup us. let my ancestor's gift and needed support reach us in time coming years. let copycat tyrant missing in frustration. bring holy glories shinily on earth. bring me Royal China and my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko to broaden my life entrenched so far here from limelight & sufficiency.

Nov 2, 2017

this post designated to be brief: I just want to report my satisfaction yesterday and today. yesterday I blogged without dream's escort and narration went smooth. this dawn I dreamt my temporary habitat in a remote place, say northwestern China. I managed a lot and barely got aboard, on train or airline, to Harbin, my current provincial capital. near last stop I found my destiny far from Harbin where almost half China apart from central China, my hometown. so intensive triumph turned half completed in fact & overestimated, I didn't regret but knew new journey ahead homecoming. then I woke up from vivid dawn sureal. yesterday I posted among boring, pale reality without nutritious dream. I contented with my work and avoid lunch. dining time I felt rewarding, and all female local people I concern shown in daily jog refreshing outside around QRRS square. their kindness leaves me supplement to complacency. after settled in dorm and TV time began, my kodi under heavy surveillance. search result of my favorite episode appeared but playing back abrupt quit before rolling up. still I harvested via youtube which much readier accessible. I learned current world affairs, some situation in China first hand there unmistakable. I also enabled gzip on my web server for speedier page load, after google reports test result on my site performance via gmail promotion. that's really nice to boost my site for greater audience. I have no other means to improve our voice, Royal China's emerging gospel, for world and our people beside this tiny technology. God dad, I really enchanted by podcasts' companion all day long during deadly siege by PRC tyranny, thx for the commodity, grant us freedom of voice & informative stream on base of poverty prevails mainland China with dying surge of ghost communism. bring me sooner my Royal China to broaden national. bring our Christmas day gift on time and cure our need of support of our living as well as investment in cyberspace. bring me sooner my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, to extend my life folded so many years alone. dad God, let me resilient as usual.

Nov 1, 2017

Its a sunny golden autumn morning. in the week I hardly in detailed dream, but still I felt so blessed. internet in PRC tightened much since the ccp congress. ai powered surveillance periodically disabled my internet upon triggered key word or something other incurred self-posed punishment. it can be dozen times in an hour. quite boring and spiteful. in the beginning of last week I almost thought I will be idle totally, but then on Wednesday I saw tasks: reinforce zhone dynamic sites with ssl from let's encrypt, a website promotes ssl worldwide with its free certificates issued more than thousands hundred copies. dabbog.com backend webapp also need update after near 2 weeks delay since its official update. I contacted godaddy hosting but the support crew made it clear that as a main upgrade godaddy will free itself responsibility but let my alone to do the update lest failure of lost. I loathed to join security tasks for I lack hacker experience and IT security training. after a day scrutinized the operational I launched near dinner time to upgrade my site, and smoothly done in an hour. it really cheers me up with new confidence in server management. next day I prepare ssl upgrade. I previously thought cert installation is the core problem, but soon I was detained by domain ownership verification hours. for one of my registrar's dns strangely didn't support root level text record, I have to single out a domain under the registrar for single certificate. then I got my first let's encrypt cert installed for 3 domains verified by dns txt record. cost some more time google web server's .htaccess hacking not to block file upload to server for verification, the another ownership of verification method adopted smoothly and 2nd let's encrypt cert installed. both likely least cost while my option one is server extension installation which has more impacts on linux os. its really marvelous to see zhone sites' ssl green & formally. since my first website on google cloud my ssl which is self-signed, never independent without malware's precaution and more click through before homepage load out. I also spend little more time to rip off http source of header & footer images to ensure full site ssl. in the weekend, ie Sunday, I demonstrated my work narrowly done in Saturday to my son, woz. my site traffic also booming recently, thanks God and faith we beholding. now its another Wednesday aimlessly, God dad, bless us with some engagements. bring me sooner my Royal China, and my Crown Queen Asoh Yukiko, for family & homage. grant us year end bonus to sustain my small investment online, and our business never so prominent in China history.

Oct 21, 2017

dreamt enter university again. the day is opening school day. I with other enrolled youth led to our school and dorm. through scenery natural hill, we passed through crowd parents to get seat in our campus. lately I carried my son explained to crowd what's philosophy in my view and why I study in university gain. my anxiety of dorm wet and over jammed disappeared at destiny chamber and I won friendship from alumni, includes alumna. my explanation turned like public speech, by which even myself moved. yesterday is salary day. I got ¥3060, 200 less than last month. even so, I arranged my monthly reunite my son in my dorm after cinema. transfering 4 domains from godaddy to dynadot almost done. dynadot home website online chat did wonderful support work. after 4 or 5 contacts including with godaddy support via land phone, I informed by dynadot crew that .io since 2017 July refuse in its whois database stores registrant information. so my long time dissatisfaction with godaddy for its hiding my registrant info with .io sponsor organization is not their fault but limitation of newly incursion. in review my smooth transfer I left positive comment on godaddy facebook page praising their gracious service. the comment arose comments at once. some of them questioned if I was godaddy's post bot. last night I read an article how insane Chinese parents flattered their kids' teacher mischief in their teacher and parent social circle via wechat, a PRC mainstream social app, and despise other parents' lawful requests for their kid's privilege like mobile not be seizure by school authority, bargain for favor of teacher. most poor Chinese just too feeble & coerced confronting organizations. that's why when I contact service providers in cyberspace I prone to be thankful even they are within my privilege: I am afraid to be punished for dispute with legal person. that reminds me long time in PRC society legal person stamp on nature person in lawless reality in socialism, and why PRC Chinese made their society a hell of institutional crime swarm: indifferent bureaucracy, warded gangster groups behaviors, shameless prey, brutal bully, hate & cry for others' transparency esp free media of voices. these characters all led to tyranny, like most mid-east countries where poorest & most violent led civilian only option, to exile. most PRC Chinese want to be a leader in an organization, for costless or at least cost efficient gains, just try to manipulate a puppet & behind curtain. and most forceful puppet is national army, largest dog or monster the tyrant invent to rein constitutionally, at cost of national surrender and sacrifice. that's the reasonable consequence of a society prefers superman/trojan horse, ie legal person to nature human. I at first thought I got the hidden truth about Chinese failure, and its cure, Capitalism, but then I saw more insane is extinguish of free speech/express, freedom of media, death of publicity. that also led me to review President Trump's efforts to blame American media. I first time felt dubious upon Trump's intention, esp my hero, former President G.W Bush recently criticize Trump, too, even undebatable Trump's self-discipline of American, and America first, both holy strategy I believe in.
God dad, PRC stepping into new Empire. but tyrant lacks qualification to put him up for throne, like what happens in Russian shows, even the small bitch trying getting his new turn of Presidency, relentlessly. nobody except holy chosen leads to Crown. that's China future political landscape. thx dad God, bring me sooner my Royal China, with my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, with new territory we vested.

Oct 13, 2017

dreamt at hometown saw my kid brother had affair with a new bride whose husband's name same as mine in the village. he is an adopted son of a couple lately had their own younger son. in half nap I heard water heat system just water pumped in this season first time against chill and made sound inside channel. then I dream my kid brother bathed with the girl together in our old family's natural earth heat spring tube. the adulterous bride is granddaughter of the only woman whose most life is introducing half wizard religion with her tool of fate-telling in the village. my passed mother first attracted by the far neighbor then introduced to my dad, who since then more closer to faith and treated the old woman friendly in his late life till elapse. the old woman's surname is Mao, the same as PRC legendary leader. she never had a child and a life time smoker which quite strange among villager women. the bride father is also adopted by the old woman whose shrank husband also in surname Zhu as the founder of the village Zhudajiu, once prince of Founder & Emperor of Ming Dynasty. my kid brother introduced I had 2 other options to bath in the village. one is my aunt's homemade, another far from village near the village's dam & fountain. I hardly settled in man-powered bath tube in my aunt house. my youngest elder sister helped me to heat the water and chat with me. I just put off most of my lower part clothes but remained my chest covered in the scenario, squatted in bath tube before the water warmed up when later my cousins, ie my aunt's children, returned & gossiped around. I just felt awfully inconvenient with rural water heat system esp bath tube in dream likes old time rural toilet, maokeng or shit pit. in the last week I almost settled transferring out 4 domains from godaddy to dynadot. at first my son's domain, woz.fm, refuse display transfer authentication code. contacted godaddy then it fixed. then zho.io stuck in missing whois information and new platform can't find my email to send me initiating verification email to start transferring. I phone called godaddy 3 times barely explained my problem by my poor English. next day the hard initiative procedure rolling into track. that's all wonders I experienced after empowered by my hometown relatives' aid, and wonderful American gift of discount of my web presence cost, near ¥1200. the whole week in unease and relief of awesome of resolving. dad God, last to settle domain will arrive next Tuesday. help us clinch it unshakably. the whole week I felt unreal with the gain. now launch me in new land of adventure lest outpaced. God dad, in long run, let my investment on domain & our web presence weightless financially, burden free while rampant accessory as civilian in western democratic market nations. let us harvest in content and purposefully resourceful. in the week I review lots of my passed life, what my life means to others, including my son and my people in PRC. I hope my free of routine job while remains productive and self-rely. Dad God, bring me sooner my Royal China to carry mission longer. bring me sooner my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better homing. thx for this golden autumn morning, dad.
1st snow in Qiqihar 2017, with bliss for zhone

By: benzrad | October 08, 2017

Oct 8, 2017

dreamt with my son woz hangout computer market which located in narrow deep lanes. just after we find a set of converter for video or something, came 2 vendors bragged their new product which has a larger capacity than ours. but we didn't give up, and gradually retreated from the place. last night a drizzle turned clear with rhythm in my dream where I at first thought the sound of dripping is ants' eating dry wood, a scenario frequents my children hometown memories. today is my birthday and I will visit my son weekly after PRC boring national day & lunar mid-autumn day holiday, in which my once and long term workplace, QRRS, left me empty hand of seasonal bonus. I badly need the highly anticipated bonus to renew my domains bu...

By: benzrad | May 26, 2017

May 25th no doubt a sunny day, in the cloudy week. but since the morning I felt gloomy. I looking for it to reunite my son so much that sores. before heading to fetch birthday cake I trying complete remnant work concerning my future 2nd child, billing zhu's facebook account, which disabled by facebook cluelessly, the freaky dominant social network more and more likes a giant monster. I then claimed another fb account under id billingzh , and added it to admin of facebook page, billinzh. that morning before my work starts, the internet is dead. buzzed the dorm director who confirmed that fiber optic cable damaged by ongoing refurnish in 3rd dorm of QRRS dorm. waiting awhile I yet can't access vpn so I open my compute stick which has builtin vpn under windows. then I found the mini computer frequently automatically shutdown. later probe found likely usb power insufficiency is the cause. in first frustration I tried to reinstall windows 10 now that a month passed yet it can't get its creator edition upgrade, lest intrusion of malware. then found my downloaded iso image months ago broken, failed to install. likely sinking PRC surveillance intervened my download. for time limit I left rebuilding open and took bus to fetch woz's birthday cake booked online in the early week. I obviously felt failed on bus even didn't figure out why. in the cake store I mandated to show groupon code but my vpn on android phone failed to open shared sms logbook on gdocs and last ten minutes before settled. I tried to tease a young girl in the shop, claiming last 2 years when I fetched cake there was only a female, now 2 boys and 2 girls there so it must be prosperous. the girl don't understand but politely responded. on bus to woz's house, I more or less in peace. out of his elemental school the grandma also there fetching him, but soon left. my son in shabby white shirt and told me he just in performance within 20 kids performed e-piano for celebrating some event. and the weekends also shifted to next day, ie Monday will be Sunday agenda and so on. I just can't in ritual mood. arrived his mom's house, I arranged woz to setup birthday cake and shot for publishment. woz also less elated like last year's birthday with cake. when I asked him his plan for future, he again claimed want to travel, aside higher school exam score. that both failed me. exam score less important to me, an entrepreneur prospect of future my son, either, and travel with his sinful mom just too risky and reckless. and he previously claimed he want less travels after last 2017 lunar spring festival hometown tour. he must lured by his desperate mom who sought escape all times. he didn't eat much birthday cake I bought, which likely bigger and dearer than last year's. I also felt no mood to taste the delicacy, and soon left there. on way to return my dorm, I first thought It was just a case to refrain myself from indulging dwelling with my son weekends. I can suffer and that's all. woz can enjoy light heart everywhere and anytime. in dorm I published event photos and videos and more turned peaceful. then I gradually saw sins and risks in my son's spiteful mom's death journey. my son shouldn't take the bait to sink, by the weight of his mom's dirty tuitions she gathered in shameless home hours from preying PRC cheap parents. I sms my son lately around 10pm and told him my thoughts upon the undue consumer commodity harmful for a kid, for its his dying mom's entertainment, meaningless and drainful. in the next morning I napped all the morning, gathering courage to cope my loneliness and self-supportive. I decide to live up with my sites, zhone portal, for holy commitment and longest prelude of my 1109 years life of China Empire inherited from my ancestor, from my dad, God in Heaven now, for my son and my offspring still at large in their idle times ample and anxious free.
God dad, I pray for strength and luminance inside for glow and growth. I pray holy mercy for the aging and solitary in molding my kingdom and generations. Dad God, I saw so many meanings in comparing Mideast and Eastern Asia, and life's withering and blossoming and their mountain difference. let me put it under lightment. let my mission more prominent, Dad God.


woz at his 12 years birthday.

By: benzrad | May 12, 2017

sunshine May 2017

May 12, 2017 

firstly dreamt likely in airport lounge, I with my son in queue for aboard. then it broke for awhile to let cargo unload. its likely railway cargo, emergent quilts and pillows for distressed people in problematic situation. once the queue restored, the conductor persuaded us buying sapling on the way, instead of brought it from hometown to destiny, for former mostly more resilient. after peed and returned to bed, I dreamt with my old family, relatives. we criticized each other, we enjoyed chatters, we are family. esp my mean nephew, ie. only son of my passed eldest sister who committed suicide in her mid age decades ago, who is so mean that defied my small loan request several times. we disappointed by counterpart but stil...

Category: blog 

Tags: site, zhone, rite, finance, gift, growth 

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